From The Director, Kathy Irvin:
February 2007
Never doubt that your children are listening and watching. This reality became very clear this January in the Junior Kindergarten classrooms. I am sure that only a few 5 year olds understand the intricacies of football, but almost all know which team is THE TEAM. Being a Bears fan, I thought it would be fun to celebrate their march to the Super Bowl with our classes. We were quickly corrected. It seems that not all AJN families root for the Bears. You will be happy to know that your children our loyal to "your" team. Their body language, pumping fists, and chants are perfect imitations of adult enthusiasm. Consequently, we quickly moved into "sportsmanship" mode. I immediately got on the Internet and printed off the logos for the four remaining teams (Bears, Colts, Saints, and Patriots) and the Packers, of course. This seemed to please all and allowed us to discuss football and sportsmanship without drawing blood. But, seriously, we need to take a good listen to and look at ourselves. Our children are catching it all. This truth became quite clear to a parent who thought her child was not listening, in fact is sure that the child was in another room in the house while she was on the phone. She was preparing dinner when the phone rang. She answered it only to hear a voice asking her to subscribe to something she didn't want to hear about. Irritated she replied, "Why do you always call during dinner. Why do you never call during sex?" Days later she ended a phone conversation with the comment, "I will have him call you after dinner." To this her child replied, "Why didn't you tell them to call during sex?"
We think that we are always repeating ourselves, but they hear us, even the first time. They listen not only to our words but also to our tone. So, do they hear us whining and complaining or do they catch us praising and supporting. When they study our faces, what do they see? And our relationships with each other, how would they describe them. In our homes, do they see parents that lift each other up, cause the other to smile with gratitude? Do they see us model prayer at meal and bed time? Do our words constantly judge or do we allow for the mistakes that come with growth, both for our selves and for our children? Some of the best moments of parenting come during the years when our children want to soak up everything we want to share. As you struggle to get your little ones to bed tonight and your exhausted selves want only to sleep, remember that these days will be over soon. There will come a day in the not too distant future when they will not want you to rock or to sing or to pray with them. But, I promise you, they will recall from deep in their souls your words, your music, your prayers, and you will have done your job. Remember, in our most stressed moments and in our greatest moments of joy we are not alone. God reaches down and says, "Life is good".